Monthly Archives: March 2015

I (Don’t) Want Your Sex

I’m not even close to being an uptight prude, but really I could do without graphic sex scenes in books. And no, I’m not talking about 50 shades of erotica. I’m talking about otherwise good books with too many gory details.

I’ve been married for over fifteen years and have two biological children, so I’m hardly a veiled virgin. I’m fine with sex scenes if they serve a purpose even if they’re not within the confines of what I consider moral. However, it doesn’t mean I want a recap of sex education with or without anatomical slang.

What are my boundaries? Like I mentioned, sometimes things need to happen. Not long ago I read a Christian novel where an unmarried believer had a sexual encounter outside of marriage. I had one of those “oh no they didn’t” moments, but it was so perfect. It was a well-played plot twist that showed how God can redeem sin. While there was no question of what transpired between these two, it wasn’t described in graphic detail. Edgy in inspirational circles but tame by most people’s standards.

On the other end of my spectrum is the Song of Fire and Ice series (the books that the HBO series “Game of Thrones” is based upon). I’m a huge fan, but the author can make me blush. I would say his scenes are the absolute edge of my tolerance and sometimes cross over to cringe-worthy in description. I’ve been listening to this series on audiobook, which makes it more noticeable since I would skim from the words “untied his breeches” to “retrieved his small clothes” (these aren’t direct quotes, but you get the picture). Listening you don’t have that luxury. Although the 15-second forward feature can be well-employed here.

One book that had me muttering, “TMI” was The Time Traveler’s Wife. I’m a sucker for any book related to time travel, but that’s a blog post unto itself. I just finished listening to the audiobook version. The story had so many things that I loved about it: The idea that Henry’s time travels are a genetic condition. The non-linear storyline. Clare is not much older than me, so I related to her timeline. In one scene, Clare and Henry attend a Violent Femmes concert about the time I was listening to them in my dorm room.

That said, while I like rock and roll, I could do without so much sex and drugs. Especially the former. When the characters describe their experience in so much detail, that I feel the need to wash my hands, it’s too much.

I appreciate when an author can bring you into a scene. That’s great when you want to know what the hero thinks about a piece of music or the sensation of time travel. But when it’s a play-by-play of what happens between the sheets, I’m fine with glossing over what happens from “unzipped my pants” to “put my shirt back on” (again not direct quotes).

What about you? Is it a line in the sand? Do you only read “clean”? Or is it that “I know it when I read it” feeling?

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I Want Candy

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I love candy, but I’m kind of picky. One of my all time favorite candies are Wild Cherry Nerds. They were discontinued sometime in the 1980s. Before then, you could get a Wild Cherry Nerds Blizzard. That was ice cream heaven and my size 5, teenage body could accommodate such indulgences.

Last summer we visited a specialty candy store and I scored these babies. I’m not wild about watermelon, but Wild Cherry Nerds – SQUEE!

I’ve also been a dark chocolate fan from my very first Hershey’s Special Dark miniature. From then on, I fought my dad for them. And my sister for the Krackle bars. I also love Nestle Crunch and supplemented more than one high school lunch with a crunch bar and Coke Classic. Back then the First Lady focused on keeping a different type of coke out of the schools. Just Say No.

I’d like to say my adult taste buds have matured. And they have. Belgian truffles have been under my Christmas tree more than once and I’m a sucker for anything marzipan or salted caramel.

But I still have an inner seven-year-old and she needs to be fed. Her favorites are cotton candy flavored rock candy, Nerds, and Sweet Tarts. She also likes it when I score February 15 bags of conversation hearts at $0.50 per bag.

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What was your favorite candy as a kid?

What about as an adult?

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